Come on people. This just isn’t my kind of luck. God is clearly telling me something. Within months of deciding it’s time to get that camera bag back on these shoulders I get an email from Scott’s college friend…basically saying “hey you’re going to be at our wedding so what do you think about photographing it for us?”  Hmm, I suppose your wedding is good enough for me. (Please read the sarcasm!)

So Scott and I jetted off for 4 days of Cabo San Lucas sunsets, 4 days of reminiscing with friends we hadn’t seen in years, 4 days of margaritas and 1 day of getting wedding photography back in my life! I was in heaven.

Jill, the bride, one of the most chill brides I’ve experienced in a decade, along with her hubby, Andy, focused the entire wedding weekend on relaxation and fun. We laughed alongside them during the lighthearted (and mostly barefoot) ceremony, enjoyed a celebration cigar, shed a tear at the words Andy expressed to his new wife and then danced, danced, danced!

And in good-spirited fun the two ended the wedding much the way they’ll start their married lives together: jumping in, without hesitation, hand-in-hand and feet first.

I thank you both for the invitation, the friendship, the vacation and the opportunity.

Much love,

Laura

---

Reese was born shortly after Mother’s Day. Of course there were lots of jokes that I wasn’t allowed to celebrate it yet since she was still cooking. Ha ha to all my friends husbands who insisted on this. I shrugged off their jabs. As far as I was concerned the swollen ankles, puffy face, sore back and lack of sleep meant I’d EARNED it.

I don’t remember if we really did anything that Mother’s Day. But I’ll never forget the flowers he got me. Or actually the card. This is what he wrote:

“The moment a child is born, the mother is also born. She never existed before. The woman existed, but the mother, never. A mother is something absolutely new.”

Scott is smart but he didn’t actually write this. It’s a quote from Bhagwan Shree Rajneesh. And it perfectly wraps up what it’s like when you finally hold your baby for the first time. It’s magical, foreign, new and exhilarating. And scary. Absolutely frightening. And wonderful. Can you see even now I clearly recall the mixed emotions. Those emotions kept me up for 3 days straight I believe.

Most people I know have their birthing “war” story except for a woman who once told me she actually “laughed” her baby out which annoyed me to no end and left me feeling like a whiner. But it’s called labor for a reason! So yes, I have my story and I’ll admit, I sometimes wear it like a badge of honor. “I worked hard for you child! Call me Fierce Birther!” I’ll spare you the details because in the end the work didn’t matter. After all the laboring, minutes later Scott and I thoughtfully discussed wanting to do it again. Immediately. The experience was so beautiful we literally couldn’t get enough. So 8 months later we found out we were having Owen.

I think we have our family. It’s not entirely out of the realm of possibility to have a third but we do feel whole right now. I’m blessed for that.

So my baby fix comes in the way of newborn sessions. A house with a newborn is beautiful. Time is standing still in those homes. You walk in and it’s quiet, the pantry is stocked for a cold-winter storm, fresh flowers are splayed around the living room, and everything you could ever need for the baby is within arms reach. I love those days. Possibly more so in hindsight, but I love them still.

---

I love writing. I’m not particularly good at it. But I love it. I love to think about it mostly. Then I sit down to write and my head becomes void of thought and ideas.

A good friend of mine, in the midst of launching a new business, said she learned from her web strategist how critical blogging is for growing a business. It allows your business to have a personality and feelings. He encouraged her to bare her soul so that her web viewers would feel more connected.

She told me because clearly she thought it would help my business too. And I agree wholeheartedly with her (and her web dude.) So here I sit earnestly thinking of something super interesting to tell you three people who read my blog so that I can grow my business.

But wait a sec! I don’t want a business.

You see, when I considered my business a “business,” I did a bunch of stuff that didn’t come from my heart. I posted images to the gallery that I hoped would bring more customers. I offered products I hoped my customers would want to buy. I wrote things on my blog to drive traffic or make people think I was really insightful and smart. I was spinning my wheels. There was no integrity. None of it came from the heart.

So I’m struggling. If I’m to do this with integrity and from the heart, what do I write about? How in this facey-pagey-look-at-me-webby-world could I possibly compete for your attention?!? How do I not get caught up in the competitive chaos we’ve created online?

Don’t compete, maybe?

With a plethora of amazing writers, bloggers, and journalists out there with truly insightful and inspiring things to say I’m realizing my place in that world. I am a consumer of their work, not the chef. What I want is to be a photographer, create relationships with people and be a bigger part of their lives while photographing the things they love.

I do want to share my life with you (yes, you lucky THREE people who have routinely read my blog over the years…thanks mom, dad and ‘anonymous commenter.’)

It’s only fair really. My friends/clients have opened themselves up enough to be in front of my lens. They/you have shared what drives you and what makes you smile. You’ve become a friend. You’ve let me be a fly on the wall of your wedding day and introduced me to your family. You’ve often confided in me how ruthless your sleepless nights are and the struggles you’ve had with choosing the right nanny. We’ve laughed and commiserated. I’ve prayed for many of you.

Relationships are a two-way street. So I will write here, inconsistently at best and when something moves me. Something real. My prose will lack eloquence and you’ll often find typos and comma splices (I have a BA in English and to this day I couldn’t tell you a comma splice from a plain old comma despite the valiant efforts of three professors at TCU.) But I promise you this: everything will come from the heart.

With love, Laura

“Live out of your imagination, not your history.” Stephen R Covey

 

Oh, right…the photography part. Here some pictures I did (for that friend who shared her web guy’s blogging philosophy) when we headed to Vail yesterday. She and her husband want to fill their Vail house with classic B&W shots of this town that has provided many memories for all of us. We were hit with a pretty heavy snow storm today so I’ll be heading back up soon to get the epic scenic shots later this month. Tough job, I know.

 

---

Well, maybe a day similar to today. January 7, 2006. We were fearful of snow so high our guests would not arrive. Instead we were given sunshine and warmth. But regardless of the weather, come rain or shine, this day will always be remembered as the one in which I couldn’t stop smiling. You are an amazing husband. You bless me. And you’ve held true to your vows: I laugh every day.

Love, Laura

---

 

My expectations were too low. In search of time for my growing family I made a huge decision to leave the work I love behind for a year. If the days had whizzed by with simply a few extra hours to read and more time for kid crafts it would have been a success. But this year also gave me rest, perspective and space. I learned from my children, random adventures and (as usual) my husband. It was a vacation for my soul. A hiatus from the hustle. The hustle I had created.

What I learned during my 2011 hiatus:

1. Kids don’t need extravagant outings. Sitting on the floor to play has the same effect.
2. Going to the grocery store is exciting when you allow yourself one treat.
3. Patience is not only a virtue but a necessity.
4. Patience isn’t as hard as I make it.
5. It’s ok to cry without good reason.
6. “Forgive and forget’ is easier for a 3 year old than a 35 year old.
7. If kids are a gift from God then who gets the credit for grandparents?
8. Rest is as important as action.
9. Action is more important than perfection.
10. If you’re going to dress like a hobo, own it.

With an indelible mark on my heart from all those lessons, here are my promises for 2012:
Reese and Owen, I promise to greet each day as brightly as you both and read one more book to you each night.
Scott, I promise to spoil you because you work too hard.
Me, I promise to spend more time outside and read every night.
To my portrait family, I promise to keep things simple, focused on you and photograph your life with passion.
To my newlyweds, I promise to get caught up in the love and excitement of your wedding.

And to my camera, I promise to take you everywhere.

With love in my heart and fuel for the next adventure,  Laura

---